Let’s get this out there first; you can’t MAKE someone engaged. You can, however, create an environment where people can choose to bring their best and be highly engaged. One of the best ways to do that is regular 1-on-1 meetings with your direct reports.
I get it, time is the most valuable asset any of us possess. What we spend our time on, then, reveals what we view as worthy of value. Dedicating time to 1-on-1s create the conditions for engagement by communicating to employees on a consistent basis, “I care about you. I have a vested interest in you and your success.”
Why, then, don’t more managers use this valuable tool effectively, or at all? There are three main reasons:
- They don’t know how to do them or are intimidated by 1-on-1 interaction, so they don’t schedule these meetings at all.
- They’re holding 1-on-1s, but only as a status check to monitor progress.
- They say they don’t have time, and this is by far the most common reason.
If you say you don’t have time to have regular 1-on-1s, you are saying you don’t have time to be an effective manager. Good, now you’ve decided to be an effective manager, here are four ways to use your 1-on-1s to do that.
1. It’s not about you
This is not a status update. Effective 1-on-1s are the team member’s meeting, not yours. Ask them to prepare the agenda (provide them with a worksheet or template, if needed). Say, “We’re going to be meeting next week. I’d like you to use this worksheet or one of your own to think ahead of time about the things you want to cover. There are a few things I want to cover, too, but we’re going to tackle yours first.” That kind of language and intent communicates that your team member and their work matters to you.
2. Energy matters
Don’t schedule these meetings at the end of the day when energy is typically low. These are important relationships and deserve our time, creativity and energy.
3. Personal concern
To the extent your team is comfortable, your communication should include the whole person and not simply their professional lives. Ask about their family, their vacations etc. You can’t fake this. You must be genuinely concerned and interested, creating a connection to the team member.
4. “Hold on, someone more important is texting me.”
For this meeting to be most successful, your phone should be out of site/mind. This goes for tablets, laptops, desk phones, smart watches and any other communication device that could interrupt the meeting.
This is a time to learn about problems you can fix to make work go smoother and more efficiently. This is a time to focus on what the employee wants to do next at the company and to give feedback on how to get there.
I don’t think there is any magic when it comes to the frequency of 1-on-1s. Weekly meetings are preferable, but bi-monthly and monthly meetings work as long as the schedule is kept. The duration can also vary. But at least a half-hour needs to be set aside for this to be effective. These meetings should not be rushed.
Besides creating the conditions for employee engagement, 1-on-1s are just as beneficial for leaders. Use that time to learn what you’re doing that’s working (and not working) to build your skillset as a manager.
Even if the feedback is not direct, if you listen, you’ll learn. You’re part of this team, and you’ll benefit from the engagement, collaboration, and camaraderie of regular 1-on-1s.